Alternate History Sports

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3/21/2021 10:26 pm  #591


Re: AltBA Design Thread

Section30 wrote:



After the dream of his hometown team falling to him, Minnesotan Section30 took to a livestream to announce his pick in the AltBA team draft. "The decision to take the Giants at such a late place of the draft was not much of a surprise, but it doesn't make it hurt any less" he stated. "I am a man of my word and Edgeworth better watch HIS F#&%ING BACK..." Section's pet cat Todd held him back, preventing him from damaging his computer in a fit of rage.

After smoking a bowl and calming down, S30 returned to the stream appearing to have mellowed out a bit. "Sorry about that everyone, I don't know what came over me... That said I am proud to announce that I will proudly be taking over as the owner for the..." Just then, Todd whispered in his ear something the mic couldn't pick up and Section began to change his tone. "Before I get to that let me first just say this. In the eyes of our lord and savior Neal Pionk, Patron Saint of Omaha, I hereby declare that I will not rest until Miles Edgeworth's kneecaps are nothing but rubble." After a couple seconds of staring blankly into the camera he then added "Oh also, Go Gladiators!" flipping off the camera and abruptly bringing the stream to an end.

Philly Philly

 
Is... is that IRL Kjell?


AHSylum Inmate
 

3/22/2021 6:50 am  #592


Re: AltBA Design Thread

League City Tx
Some 13 year old walks into a press conference with nothing but his underwear on. The first question the media asks him is : “Why are you in your underwear?” He smiles brightly and says: “because I can, dumbasses.” As he prepares his announcement, the media waits patiently, waiting for what he has to say. He finally speaks at the conference: “I have officially announced the purchase of the Indiana Cardinals. It’s Hoosier basketball time!”



Owner of the Indiana Cardinals (2005 AltBA Champions) the owner of the Memphis Kings, and new owner of the Milwaukee Mallards! #HoosierBirds #KingUp #QuackQuack
 

3/22/2021 9:01 am  #593


Re: AltBA Design Thread

I believe this is the updated list. DireBear is on the clock. 

Pittsburgh, Los Angeles, Louisville and Denver remain. 


 
     Thread Starter
 

3/22/2021 10:49 am  #594


Re: AltBA Design Thread

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE:

A singular Los Angeli, California

22 March 2021

Several journalists surrounded a singular computer that was to announce the team that the anonymous man named DireBear would pick. After at least a day of waiting, the computer finally turned on with all journalists waking up for the news. All the screen read was: “THE INFINITE LOS ANGELI HAVE REDUCED TO ONE. THE OLYMPIANS NOW BELONG TO ME.” As soon as this happened, Dire walked into the meeting room wearing an undersized orange toga and a white beard glued onto his face. He then announced: “I’m taking my talents to LA, we are all love Olympics.” He then only took a single question, which was his reaction to Chicago being taken before him. Dire then stood up, and laughed as hard as he could while exiting this strange press conference.



Founder of the EFL and the AFL
 

3/22/2021 11:19 am  #595


Re: AltBA Design Thread

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE:

Pittsburgh, PA

The 22nd pick on the 22nd day of the month of March, in the year of our Lord 2021.


Pittsburgh, the great steel city of western Pennsylvania, in an auditorium of Robert Morris University. A crowd of reporters are crammed into the desks meant for college kids. Why Robert Morris? Well, it was close to the airport, and I wanted to get this done as soon as possible. Three figures walk out, the taller the familiar figure of Dan O'Mac, owner of the New York Emperors, wearing jeans, a yellow O'Mac and Sons Entertainment Enterprises, LLC hoodie, his beard still graying and his long hair pulled back in a man bun as usual. He's wearing flip flops for some reason. To his right is a slightly taller child with shorter hair, wearing athletic pants and a Tony Hawk shirt. To his left, a slightly shorter child with longer hair, wearing a Minecraft shirt and jeans with the knees torn out of them. Kid O'Mac 1 and 2.

Dan: Welcome to Moon Township. As the head of O'Mac and Sons Entertainment Enterprises, owners of the AltFL's playoff qualifying New York Emperors, I would like to tell you a bit about our next purchase. In case you couldn't figure it out, as we're here in Pittsburgh, I, on behalf of O'Mac and Sons Entertainment Enterprises, am here to announce our purchase of the Pittsburgh Hammers. We look forward to taking this team and not only succeeding as our company expects, but building rivalries with the other teams in our division, especially the Philadelphia Gladiators and Boston Schooners. We would be more inclined to build a rivalry with the New York Sentinels had Steelman's purchase gone through as expected, but we move on from here.

Dan O'Mac and kids all put on Hammers hats at this point.

Dan: And now, we get to work on building our franchise, ensuring a quality and desirable arena to play in, and bring in the best players to Pittsburgh. It's Hammer Time!

Dan and children head out of the auditorium, ignoring any questions from the reporters. Mostly because Dan is too lazy to think of answers for them.

TL;DR - Pittsburgh Hammers #ItsHammerTime

Last edited by Dan O'Mac (3/22/2021 11:19 am)



2x Alt Champion :: AltLB Champion Oklahoma City Bison - 2022 :: AltFL Champion New York Emperors - 2022
 

3/22/2021 11:24 am  #596


Re: AltBA Design Thread

For Immediate Release

Denver, Colorado

Due to unforeseen circumstances, the originally planned fantasy owner has sadly been scratched (not by the healthiest one). In their place stands two bagel bros. Bagels? Yes bagels. You're reading that right. The Co-owners of the worlds most successful bagel company, Bagel Bros Entertainment Incorporated, have now purchased their first fully functional AltSports team, The Denver Mountaineers.

In an interview with one owner, BDoof, was asked how much experience he had with basketball, he had this to say, "You take the ball. You shoot the ball. You... win. It can’t be that hard, can it?"

The other owner, Magic, commented, “I heard about this, and jumped on it. Do I have any idea what I’m doing? Absolutely not. Will I know? Nope. I do theatre, not basketball. But it can’t be that hard. Ball+Hoop=Points. Simple. Also, since people will ask. No hot tub from me. Just basketball.”

Magic then proceeded to run off the makeshift stage and into an awaiting limo, as she had yet another theatre production to attend to. She left behind BDoof to close the press conference, who tried making shadow puppet bagels play basketball. Suffice to say, it was not the more entertaining performance.



Owner of the AltHL's Alaska Auroras, AltLB's Kansas City Colts, AltFL's Kentucky Stallions,  AltCAA's University of Kansas City Cosmos (2001 Legacy Champions)
 
 

3/22/2021 12:22 pm  #597


Re: AltBA Design Thread

Ladies and Gentlemen! We have a league! 

This marks the conclusion of Stage 1 of the AltBA. I wanted to thank everyone for your participation throughout this process. Like always, this community has made 2020 and now 2021 bearable. 

Now we move forward. 

Stage 2 means that you are in control of your team. So you can post about them as you'd like. From uniform combinations to faux social media posts you can find fun ways to bring your team to life. 

For now, feel free to post your arena.  You can choose to have one or two arenas. 1 modern and 1 for the legacy project.  I will record them so I can use them in various ways moving forward. If you live in a city with an AltHL team you are welcome to reach out to that owner and see if you'd like to share the arena together. OR you can just build your own. 

Also we need to name the divisions. Please reach out to the owners in your division to come up with your georgraphic division name. 

Alt Universe on the horizon:

We are going to take a little design break. Let everyone who has designed the logos and uniforms a little creative rest. 

While we rest we are going to begin the AltBA Legacy project...TODAY! 

In a few weeks we are going to start the AltHL Expansion process. We will expand in a way that makes sense for the league as a whole. We will update you as to how all of that is going to work a little later. 

This summer we will start the AltLB. So get excited to round out our Alt Universe with baseball.  

Once again thank you everyone for all that you do to make this community so great. I also found the press releases quite entertaining. I like how the great majority of owners paint themselves as eccentric people who are always in a rush to leave the room. The weirdest Alt owner would be the normal one and that is for sure. Stay tuned this aftertoon for the beginning of the AltBA Legacy Project.

Last edited by Gritty (3/22/2021 12:23 pm)


 
     Thread Starter
 

3/22/2021 12:27 pm  #598


Re: AltBA Design Thread

Out of curiosity, will we also be doing a "G League" and hiring coaches?



2x Alt Champion :: AltLB Champion Oklahoma City Bison - 2022 :: AltFL Champion New York Emperors - 2022
 

3/22/2021 12:43 pm  #599


Re: AltBA Design Thread

For the legacy project, the Sentinels played at the Veterans Memorial Arena in East Ruterford, New Jersey, just outside NYC. The arena was built in 1958 and sat 16,000 for Sentinel games. It was one of the louder arenas in Basketball, with many season ticket holders saying they had temporary hearing damage after the season concluded. But all good things must come to an end, as they say and after the last AltBA legacy season, the Sentinels time at the "VMA" as locals called it came to an end. 

The Sentinels modern arena is the beautiful, brand-spanking new Shake Shack Center in the heart of Brooklyn. It will seat 20,000 fans and NYC-based fast food chain Shake Shack will be the official food distributor of your New York Sentinels. Owner Rugrat was thrilled to announce the exciting news at his Zoom press conference. "As much as we will miss the VMA, our fans will love this arena as much as I do!" said the owner. The Arena also includes a parking lot underneath the court, a first of its kind. 

During that same press conference, Rugrat also announced the hiring of Duke Basketball head coach Mike Krzyzewski, commonly known as "Coach K". "A 5 time NCAA champion, Mr. Krzyzewski should bring leadership to the Sentinels" Rugrat also announced the Sentinels G-league team will be located in his hometown of Tucson, Arizona. "Why Tucson, all the way across the country?" he was asked. "Because it's my team and I can do whatever the hell I want with them." The team will be known as the Tucson Tamales after the food that is popular in Tucson from the city's promanent Mexican population. 

Last edited by Rugrat (3/22/2021 1:52 pm)




 
 

3/22/2021 1:14 pm  #600


Re: AltBA Design Thread

Dan O'Mac wrote:

Out of curiosity, will we also be doing a "G League" and hiring coaches?

Yes! Sorry totally forgot about the G-League. Feel free to make your G-League team and definitely hire your head coach! Thanks for the reminder. 


 
     Thread Starter
 

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